Venti Non-Fat Latte Hillarious! Also, Here's an update on Roger Ebert While on vakay, I blogged about his obnoxiousness

Last night I shared a dinner table with Roger Ebert and his wife. I had skipped his lecture on the best movies of the year, because if he mentioned Farenhooey 911 I would have to give him a poke in the eye, and this is supposed to be a tranquil, reflective retreat vacation and no poking in the eye is allowed. But when I went as a single into dinner last night, they put me at his table. I tried to be good, and when the other person at the table rambled on about how she wasn't for Kerry but it seems like a lot of young people voting for Kerry, I said nothing. Then Roger said, Oh you don't have to vote for Kerry, as long as you don't vote for Bush. I couldn't keep quiet and said "Sorry" He looked aghast and said Bush is dangerous. I gave him the Irish eyeball and he backed off. The rest of the dinner went fine and in the end Roger, his wife and I sang Side By Side.

I was surfin' yesterday and ran across his film review this weekend of The Corporation

I was at a health ranch last week, where the idea is to clear your mind for serene thoughts. At dinner one night, a woman at the table referred to Arizona as a "right to work state." Unwisely, I replied: "Yeah -- the right to work cheap." She said, "I think you'll find the non-union workers are quite well paid." Exercising a supreme effort of will to avoid pronouncing the syllables "Wal-Mart," I replied: "If so, that's because unions have helped raise salaries for everybody." She replied: "The unions steal their members' dues." I replied, "How much money would you guess the unions have stolen, compared to corporations like Enron?" At this point our exchange was punctuated by a kick under the table from my wife, and we went back to positive thinking.

Do you think he was rude to someone every night? It did get better at the end of the week. I was at a table with other people and the topic of reality TV came up. Yes we all loved The Apprentice. And I said that the other show I watched was The Batchelor, when my friend Brooks Firestone's son was on it. A man at the table said "You know Brooks Firestone?" I said yes. He said Oh yes, you're from Sacramento. It turns out that he was Gerald Warren, Nixon's Deputy Press Secretary and one of the seven potential suspects that historians and the press thought might be Watergate's "Deep Throat". I wish I had known when I was talking to him. I just discovered the Deep Throat thing this minute while googling to make sure I spelled his name right!

Hot Pants - Pt. 1 Lyric

One-two One-Two-Three uh!
Hot pants- hey hot pants uh! smokin?
Hot pants- smokin? that-hot pants
That?s where it?s at a-that?s where it?s at
Take your fine self home
It looks much better than time
My fever keeps growin?
Girl you?re blowin? my mind
Thinkin? of loosin that funky feelin? don?t uh!
Cause you got to use just what you got
To get just what you want-a

Hey hu!
Hot pants! hey! hot pants smokin?!
Hot pants make ya sure of yourself -good Lord
You walk like you got the only lovin? left hey
So brother- if you?re thinkin? of loosin? that feelin?
Then don?t- ha
Cause a woman got to use what she got
To get just what she wants hey!
Hey hotpants
A-look a-hot pants won?t make ya dance

But as slick as you are-ah! YOU make the pants

Uh! hey brother- do ya like it?
The girl over there with the funky pants on ha!
She can ah! do the chicken all night long
The girl over there with the hot pants on uh!
She can do the Funky Broadway all night long
The girl over there with the hot pants on
Filthy MacNasty all night long

Get down hu! the one over there
With the mini dress ha!
I ain?t got time- I still dig that mess
Get down! but I like the hot pants

Hey! I like a hot pants

(Short Instrumental)

Ooooh! Bring it home!
One more! Hit me! Aaay!
Bring it home! Bring it home!
Oh uh! Bring it on home

Bring it on home...

The Bloggers are still mixing it up

Little Miss Attila thinks Clinton's laugh is outrageous
Small Dead Animals has a source who knows what he's talking about
Slings and Arrows has good timing
Balloon Juice debunks the demo talking points
Matt Yglesias shows why this wasn't a sharp Republican operative leak
Fred wonders how Sandy could be so stupid
It's a pretty thin cover to Baldilocks
Citizen Smash would have been charged at least $50 thousand in fines and spent 10 years in prison if he'd done what the burglar is accused of
Scrappleface exposes the roll of the Pets.com mascot in the Berger conspiracy

Hot Pants

want to hear it?

The Burglar Quit

More info from the Blogworld

Now that he's quit, will Kerry pretend he never knew him? Reminds me a little of Big Bill"s "Most Ethical Administration in History"

Wizbang thinks that Sandy may have forgot it was a crime
Jay's not surprized
Powerline gives Denny Hastert's take
The Spoon wonders if Sandy is a spy
In the Bullpen shows The Burglar's Busted
Original Musings muses that the wacky democrats are at it again
Slant Point thought that the 9/11 Commission drama was over
Pardon My English is grilling burgers
Generation Why says the Coverup Begins
Matt doesn't want you to act all surprized
Belmont Club knows we're not in Kansas anymore
That Liberal Media notes how the AP downplays the Kerry Connection
In Just One Minute you can compare Sandy Berger with Joe Wilson
Even Joshua Micah Marshall wonders why Sandy Berger didn't quit Kerry's campaign a long time ago
Little Green Footballs says Berger's radioactive
The Third Hand wonders how hard it is to remove documents from the National Archive
Poliblog has a sloppy Berger, is that like a sloppy Joe?
It's a Small Victory when you dream about Greg Brady, Vinnie Barbarino and Johnnie Cochran
At Suburban Sundries you can get the Carl Cameron version of the story
The Hog On Ice suspects Kerry in the Pants Scandal
If you're Right on the Left Beach, you're sad that there truly aren't any good democrats left
The Tronmetter Times doesn't suppose the 9/11 Commission will hold it's report until they find the missing documents
Virginia Postrel is willing to believe Sandy Berger had no nefarious motives
But Daniel Drezner wonders What the f@$# was Sandy Berger thinking?
What does Security of Classified really mean asks Brain Fertilizer
The Queen of All Evil doesn't know what to think
Ipse Dixit reminds us that Sandy ought to know better, he used to be National Security Advisor fer cryin' out loud
Knight of the Mind is succint, Berger gets Fired, Kerry Avoids the Grill

and the fabulous Hugh Hewitt asks the main question What Did Kerry Know and When Did He Know It

I'm pitching the name Hot Pants Scandal for this thing ... What do you think? Pass It On

Hamburglar and Sticky Finger Food
 
Will Sandy Berger get the attention/punishment/scorn he deserves? 
 
Some Top Bloggers are on the story ...
 
Blogospherics asks just how secure WERE we when he wasin charge?
The Monkeys are singing Cry, Cry, Cry All the Way to Jail
Miller asks if Sandy's just Happy to See Us
Blackfive warns about Rodent's of Unusual Size
The Captain tells it straight, Clinton's NSA Stole Notes, Documents from 9/11 Commission
Outside the Beltway's tracking the Blogosphere reporting 
Slings and Arrows says it's Watergate Revisited 
The Shark reports Kerry Advisor Under Investigation
Blogs For Bush wonders Kerry Campaign Adviser Guilty of "3rd Rate Burglary"?:
Blogs of War has the breaking news:  
Backcountry Conservative asks 'Clinton, Kerry Advisor Sandy Berger Pilfered Classified Docs?'
The Command Post notes Sandy Berger probed 
The CA Yankee wonders what Berger is trying to hide

 

I'm Baaack
 
and I'm Not In Love
 
I'm not in love, so don't forget it.
It's just a silly phase I'm going through.
And just because I call you up,Don't get me wrong,
don't think you've got it made.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
I like to see you, but then again,
That doesn't mean you mean that much to me.
So if I call you, don't make a fuss;
Don't tell your friends about the two of us.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
I keep your picture upon the wall.
It hides a nasty stain that's lying there.
So don't you ask me to give it back.
I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
Ooh, you'll wait a long time for me.
Ooh, you'll wait a long time.
I'm not in love, I'm not in love...

More Vacation Blogging

When I scheduled this vacation, I didn't realize it was going to be the Kedwards Campaign Rally. But I should have I guess. The target market for Rancho La Puerta is affluent, urban females with a high interest in environmental and health issues. Or women from the blue states. My first week, I was intimidated. But I'm finding my groove. Now when they try and bring up Farenhooey 911, I say you shouldn't believe everything you hear or see. I tell them that I could read books about how Bill Clinton assassinated Ron Brown and others, but I don't. Because I know that you have to have both the prosecution and defense give their arguments before you can evaluate whether a case has merit. Then I tell them about how I read the book Senatorial Privilege: The Chappaquiddick Cover-Up ten years ago. And how I'll always believe that Ted Kennedy left that girl alive and just abandoned her with wanton disregard for life. I wish I'd never read it, because perhaps if I'd read a defense I wouldn't believe so strongly that he should be in prison. Since they believe he was guilty also, they give up arguing with me.

Alicia Colon speaks more succinctly

If someone dares to confront me, I'll give them the following facts: Mr. Bush liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled Al Qaeda, put nuclear inspectors in Libya, Iran, and North Korea without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist dictator who slaughtered 300,000 of his own people. He may not be glib or articulate, but he's doing a great job.

The economy is booming, unemployment is down, and Mr. Bush wants to make tax cuts permanent. So why on earth would I support Mr. Kerry, who cares more about what the world thinks of us than about what's good for us?

I Love Rock 'n Roll

MICHAEL Moore messed with the wrong rocker when he charged that The Who's Pete Townshend refused to allow his classic hit "Won't Get Fooled Again" to be used in "Fahrenheit 9/11." Biting back on his Web site, Townshend said the reason the song wasn't used was not because he was for the war in Iraq (which he admits he was), but because he doesn't trust Moore's accuracy in reporting and regards Moore as a bully. "When first approached, I knew nothing about the content of his film 'Fahrenheit 9/11,' " Townshend writes. "I had not really been convinced by 'Bowling for Columbine,' and had been worried about its accuracy . . . Once I had an idea what the film was about, I was 90 percent certain my song was not right for them." The rock legend continued, "I greatly resent being bullied and slurred by him in interviews just because he didn't get what he wanted from me. It seems to me that this aspect of his nature is not unlike that of the powerful and willful man at the center of his new documentary . . . [Moore will] have to work very, very hard to convince me that a man with a camera is going to change the world more effectively than a man with a guitar."


The Who
Won'T Get Fooled Again

We'll be fighting in the streets
With our children at our feet
And the morals that they worship will be gone
And the men who spurred us on
Sit in judgement of all wrong
They decide and the shotgun sings the song

I'll tip my hat to the new constitution
Take a bow for the new revolution
Smile and grin at the change all around
Pick up my guitar and play
Just like yesterday
Then I'll get on my knees and pray
We don't get fooled again

(small instrumental)

The change, it had to come
We knew it all along
We were liberated from the fold, that's all
And the world looks just the same
And history ain't changed
'Cause the banners, they are flown in the next war

I'll tip my hat to the new constitution
Take a bow for the new revolution
Smile and grin at the change all around
Pick up my guitar and play
Just like yesterday
Then I'll get on my knees and pray
We don't get fooled again
No, no!

(instrumental)

I'll move myself and my family aside
If we happen to be left half alive
I'll get all my papers and smile at the sky
Though I know that the hypnotized never lie
Do ya?

(instrumental)

There's nothing in the streets
Looks any different to me
And the slogans are replaced, by-the-bye
And the parting on the left
Is now parting on the right
And the beards have all grown longer overnight

I'll tip my hat to the new constitution
Take a bow for the new revolution
Smile and grin at the change all around
Pick up my guitar and play
Just like yesterday
Then I'll get on my knees and pray
We don't get fooled again
Don't get fooled again
No, no!

(instrumental)

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Meet the new boss
Same as the old boss

See you in a couple weeks




Update:

Last night I shared a dinner table with Roger Ebert and his wife. I had skipped his lecture on the best movies of the year, because if he mentioned Farenhooey 911 I would have to give him a poke in the eye, and this is supposed to be a tranquil, reflective retreat vacation and no poking in the eye is allowed. But when I went as a single into dinner last night, they put me at his table. I tried to be good, and when the other person at the table rambled on about how she wasn't for Kerry but it seems like a lot of young people voting for Kerry, I said nothing. Then Roger said, Oh you don't have to vote for Kerry, as long as you don't vote for Bush. I couldn't keep quiet and said "Sorry" He looked aghast and said Bush is dangerous. I gave him the Irish eyeball and he backed off. The rest of the dinner went fine and in the end Roger, his wife and I sang Side By Side.

Side By Side
Sung by Kay Starr
Written by: Harry Woods

Oh, we ain't got a barrel of money
Maybe we're ragged and funny
But we'll travel along, singin' a song
Side by side
Don't know what's comin' tomorrow
Maybe it's trouble and sorrow
But we'll travel the road, sharin' our load
Side by side
Through all kinds of weather
What if the sky should fall
Just as long as we're together
It doesn't matter at all
When they've all had their quarrels and parted
We'll be the same as we started
Just travelin' along, singin' our song
Side by side

See that sun in the mornin'
Peekin' over the hill
I'll bet you sure, it always has
And it always will
Well, that's how I feel about someone
And somebody feels about me
We're sure in love with each other
And that's the way it's gonna be

Oh, we ain't got a barrel of money...
(REPEAT CHORUS IN ITS ENTIRETY)

and btw

Happy Birthday President Bush!

It's Wictory Wednesday

Employment UP

Economy UP

Democracy UP

Poll Numbers UP

It's Wictory Wednesday and you know what to do. Today's the day when we ask our readers to donate and volunteer in the campaign to re-elect President George W. Bush. You don't have to bankrupt yourself, send $10, or better yet, $12, the amount you saved by skipping Farenwhooey 911. And if you volunteer at the web site, you can meet your republican neighbors. It's fun and easy!

And check out these fine blogs...

Congratulations to All